I just want to say thank you to Gene, Cristina, and all of you for a wonderful evening!

Here are two pictures of me walking home through the park. I am safely home now. 🙂

Good night!

Professor Gene Fellner
Arts-based Research
Shawn Brown
3/13/18

Drawing Attention

As a Principal, I have the daunting task of creating engaging professional development for tenured, veteran teachers. It is challenging to get teachers to share their thoughts after a long day of work. There is also their fear of being penalized for sharing anything that goes against the viewpoints of the administrative staff. Trowbridge also shares that, “Teachers were reserved about sharing their observations.” In my opinion, fear erodes the fabric of the Department of Education via constant hierarchical tensions. In art, there are no rights or wrongs. Sketching a diorama creates a safe place for teachers.
Immerging research speaks to the need for alternative routes in connecting to students. Mindfulness exercises are becoming more common in schools.” Many schools are teaching soft skills to students and teachers. With recent incidents of violence, administrators are being held accountable for training staff to notice subtleties in students. Meditation and contemplation are healthier alternatives to engaging school communities. Using places outside of the building makes senses. There is a sense of neutrality when observing art in a museum. During any given school day my staff and I have limited time to contemplate anything. Pressure to performance comes from all sides and leaves very little room for reflection. It also stems from a westernized educational structure. Trowbridge shared how teachers were, “Pleasantly surprised to engage in five minutes of breathing meditation.” I believe the shock arises from growing up in an educational system that frowned upon such behavior or detached such activities from the learning process. When first entering the graduate center, I had a warped sense of what true education involved. I would stay quiet, keep my thoughts to myself, and hope that I could get through the day without being scrutinized. I have learned that education is about exploring, questioning, contemplation, and considering multiple approaches. Teachers can be consumed with avoiding being written up, having low test score, and negatively influencing graduation rates. It becomes challenging to be mindful. Trowbridge states, “mindfulness is awareness that arises through paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, non-judgmentally.” It becomes increasingly difficult to do so in an educational system that is so demanding. As a Principal, I dislike being the source of chatter in the minds of my teachers. As much as I want them to have this space, I am bombarded with new initiatives from the central office, and the constant fear of being terminated for not making quantitative gains. I know that the silencing of this chatter will lead to long-lasting growth, but I can be near-sighted in my leadership due
to external pressure.

Teachers from all content areas would benefit from this activity. The ability to still the mind and participate in learning as an adult is needed for all educators. One teacher stated, “Using visual learning, drawing allowed me to focus attention.”
It was interesting to see the concentration that each teacher paid to diverse parts of the diorama. It is helpful to compare and contrast each drawing to notice hidden biases and perspectives of teachers. This activity can have a broader conversation about implicit bias, race, gender roles, etc. The use of the non-dominate hand was an unusual practice. Teachers stated, “By drawing with my non-dominant hand, I was forced to draw more slowly if I wanted to keep the proportions.”
This practice would be useful in helping teachers to consider the many difficulties that students face. Teachers in my school, as well as myself, would love to participate in these activities, but we face the task of ensuring that students pass state exams, earning credits, adhering to Danielson’s framework, and pass Regents exams. The space for creativity, meditation, and contemplation seems to be reserved for the specialized schools that do not take state exams. I believe that the face of public education and instructional practices would look very different if the pressure of passing state exams were removed.

Professor Gene Fellner
Course: Art-based Research
Shawn Brown
Date: 3/12/2018

Of Kings and Queens

In the last two or so weeks I have been looking at different pieces of art. I have been thinking about the different eras in which Black men lived. I think about what it may have felt like to an African Pharaoh during pre-colonial Africa. Their power was all consuming, and their confidence was immeasurable. The Pharaoh was considered a god on earth, the intermediary between the Gods and the people.. I think about the music, jewelry, and fashion of that age. The aroma of traditional African foods, the community coming together in celebration. When investigating these images, I look at the position of their chins, the confidence in their eyes, the preparation that took place before sculpting their likeness on tombs, pyramids, and different forms of currency. I will use these images to take the audience on a journey into the past.

Slavery

Being taken from one’s home by ghosts along the western shores. Separated from family and friends. Cramped in spaces, raped, strange ailments, disease, starvation, lying in feces, death staring at you as you sleep through storms in the Atlantic Ocean. Friends were refusing to be enslaved and choosing suicide instead of bondage. I think about the Black men wearing irons around their hands, feet, and neck being marched off looking back at a life they will never see again. The words of Fredrick Douglas haunt me as I look at these images. He discusses the process of manufacturing good slaves:

“I have found that to make a contented slave, it is necessary to make a thoughtless one. It is necessary to darken his moral and mental vision, and, as far as possible, to annihilate the power of reason. He must be able to detect no inconsistencies in slavery; he must be made to feel that slavery is right, and he can be brought to that only when he ceases to be a man.

This image illustrates how slavers purposefully dehumanized Black men. Again I look at the eyes, the chin, etc. I see how Black men were broken in spirit and taken from high positions they held in their homeland. This transition left several men spiritless, wondering throughout the world in search of life’s meaning. This image reminds me of the domestication of animals for farm work. In my project, I will attempt to represent this transition through a multi-media structured approach.

Say it Loud

I think of the pride and strength of the Black community during this time. Black communities came together to fight for and demand equal rights. Chants of no justice, no peace reverberated throughout the streets. I Am A Man banners flying through the warm winds of revolution. Metals that adorned the necks of slaves are used to create a new funk/jazz during The Harlem Renaissance. Against systemic political retaliation, Blacks were diligently making long-lasting changes to policy, civil rights, and reframing the images of Black men nationwide. Malcolm armed prepared to protect his family. Martin on the bridge at Selma. What a sight to behold. I think of them standing tall and looking at their oppressors directly in the eyes as they spoke. Shortly after this period, the government assassinated all civil rights leaders. These murdered of our heroes had come too late to stop the revolution. These images inspired Black men to seize their humanity once again. Black Panther Leader Huey P. Newton defined the power that we had so desired when
he said, “Black Power is giving power to people who have not had power to determine their destiny.

Present times

Barack Obama’s elections began to start a shift in the way that Black men looked at themselves. Previous to his election, many Black men had no one to look to for leadership. Our representation in the political arena was minimal at best. His consistent image throughout media encourages several Black men to lead their households, become professionals in their field, and improve as parents. Though the presidency has taken a horrible turn, Black men are learning to love themselves once again. Despite how America may see us, we have begun to make significant changes in many several areas. Barack models how to lead with grace, humility, and always finding a way to unite different races. He states, “It’s important for us to also understand that the phrase ‘Black Lives Matter’ simply refers to the notion that there’s a specific vulnerability for African Americans that needs to be addressed. It’s not meant to suggest that other lives don’t matter. It’s to suggest that other folks aren’t experiencing this particular vulnerability.”

Personal thoughts

I am interested doing this project to address problems I have with my perceived image. As I navigate the world, I think about how I am seen and understood. I think of W.E.B Dubois’s double consciousness. I think about how members of other ethnic groups view me. I think about whether I am respected for my physicality or my intellect. I think about my interactions with law enforcement and the constant fear of being killed because of a broken tail light. I think about being mistaken for the custodian and never accidentally mistaken for the principal. It happens every time a paramedic, police officer, educational consultant enters the school. I also struggle with being inundated with negative images of Black men regularly throughout media. In some ways, this has socialized me to have racial biases towards my own people. This project is an attempt to de-essentialize perceptions of all Black men from a social-temporal manner. All humans, including Black men, evolve.
I think about how much Black men have to wrestle with, the multiple identities that we navigate throughout the day. You have to change who you are when driving to work, when arriving at work, while walking in the street, when traveling back home, while at home, in the gym, at church, etc. The amount of energy that is exerted throughout those transitions consumes the majority of our day. Through my project, I will attempt to articulate the many faces, temperaments, and conflicts that Black men face regularly. By doing so, I want to challenge the audience to embrace the many variations and shades of the Black experience.

Bibliography

“10 Powerful Quotes on Race, Unity From Obama This Week.” Global Citizen. Accessed March 12, 2018. https://www.globalcitizen.org/en/content/obama-quotes-dallas-memorial-town-hall-race-unity/.
“Douglass_Narrative.Pdf.” Accessed March 12, 2018. https://www.ibiblio.org/ebooks/Douglass/Narrative/Douglass_Narrative.pdf.
“Huey Newton Quotes.” BrainyQuote. Accessed March 12, 2018. https://www.brainyquote.com/authors/huey_newton.
“Pharaoh – Ancient History Encyclopedia.” Accessed March 12, 2018. https://www.ancient.eu/pharaoh/.

Bibliography

Trowbridge (2017) describes how being in the moment helps with self-awareness and focuses on multi-perspectives. I attempted to embrace these notions of self-awareness and multi-perspectives when I video recorded my children interacting with each other (and me) as they looked at the three images I share with you last week. It did not go as I planned, of course. They were goofing around, giggling, making jokes (not always good ones) and not sticking to the plan, my plan that is. And as difficult as it seemed (and frustrating at the moment), I decided to let it go and let them be who they are in all their silliness and then try and learn something from analyzing our interaction. I am working on transcribing the video to help me analyze what happened and begin to make sense of it. Certain things were very clear already. When I showed my kids the images and asked them what they remember about that day they said, “I don’t remember that day at all.” (They both remembered the graduation day and described how they felt in that day or even in the picture, which was great, but not the others.) At first, I thought to myself, “Great, where do we go from here?” But then I realized that the fact that they don’t remember it, is significant in itself! These moment mean a lot to me, because I was the one taking the picture and I do have memory of those days partially because of the pictures, to them these are just normal days, without any significant memories. And as we talked and as one reminded the other about the day and the details in that day we created a new memory by viewing the images.
Another thing that emerged was their awareness about my emotions looking at these images. The exchange that followed after I asked them about how they thought I felt about these images, was very interesting to me. My son, who was not aware of me taking the images, looked at the images for a long time and then at me and said that I was probably feeling melancholy, which in itself is, probably, not that groundbreaking, but I felt a connection created that was not there before through the process of viewing the images.

I will work on transcribing the video in the next week and perhaps write down my own narrative. I will also print out all the images that I have and bring them with me to class next week (03/21) to share with you and ask for your feedback.

See you all at the AMNH on Wednesday!

I loved our reading this week about Cristina Trowbridge’s work at AMNH. Along with being a movement teacher for kids, my mom also taught museum education with Cristina. Of course I didn’t know the theory behind what she was doing. I just knew how fun it was to go to the museum with her. Freire and Vygotsky, two of the educators I’m drawing from in my education research, speak to the power of social learning. Vygotsky to the zone of proximal development, meaning that when we work on a shared project or task, individuals are able to do things that they wouldn’t be able to alone. Freire also speaks to the greater wisdom that emerges when people’s reflection on lived experience “encounters” one another. I love how Cristina and the Education Department at AMNH use dioramas as an entry point into group observing, reflecting and learning.

Cristina brings in mindfulness and how the experience of social learning at a diorama could translate into growing contemplation in the classroom. I thought it was an interesting way to think about a critical approach to education in the classroom. In so many of the teachers comments, I could see their frustration arising from policies that make learning impossible, which to me are rooted in a racist, economically unjust system. As a community organizer, I’m more familiar with responses to injustice that have to do with collective action towards new laws, policies and choices at the institutional level. What I saw in Cristina’s writing was another type of subversion I hadn’t thought of before;  neoliberal educational policies undermine learning because they create this frenetic pace in the classroom that undermines the authentic learning Cristina speaks about. I found it fascinating to think about contemplation as a tool for having more agency over the pace of learning and that slowing down (as I see it a subversive response to the neoliberal pressures to speed up) is a bridge to understanding imperfection as a part of learning. Cristina showed me these links between the pace of contemplation, opening up to imperfection, and engaging in authentic learning.

In terms of my project, I’m planning this week to start some writing I may want to include in my piece about different stories in my mom’s voice she told me throughout my life about her own life and our family history. I’ll also do some writing in my own voice, and I’m thinking that will either be my voice recounting different important moments in my own life or it could be questions I’ve asked myself and reflections I’ve had through this process of care taking, searching for connection, and identity transformation. I may also begin to put some of the fabric on regular computer paper to start testing out different mixes of fabric, paint and words.

While reading the Christina A. Trowbridge chapter, Drawing Attention: Notes from the Field, I could not help but draw parallels between her experiences with dioramas and my project. Trowbridge states, “when this activity is done with other people (sketching and looking and talking) participants’ plural realities and experiences can be shared and the group can create together knowledge…” (2017). I hope that my project accomplishes precisely this, the creation of collective inclusive knowledge of what it is to be someone who embodies both the oppressor and the oppressed. Gene pointed out the universality of this embodiment when he stated, “I also think that each of us combines some aspect of the oppressor-oppressed duality” (personal communication, Feb. 5, 2018). I concur; however, I’m focusing on this duality in the Latino/a culture, in my reality as a Latina.

Trowbridge, in her description of the sketching activity, highlights the importance of multiple perspectives and many truths. This emphasizes for me the importance that my project be collaborative and have a space in which participants’ voices are heard. The idea for the participants to be “discoverers” (Trowbridge, 2017) resonates with me; however, I want them to be co-creators as well. The project, the Three Doras (I’m very grateful to Anna for her suggestion but I cannot help and feel that I’m being a little pretentious), will have space in which the participants can write or draw anything they want as a response to a targeted question while looking at themselves in a mirror. This mirror is meant to represent a metaphorical look into our inner selves.

Art affords opportunities (as defined by James Gibson in Trowbridge, 2017) and productivity (Trowbridge, 2017) for both artist and participants. It can open a door to new possibilities never contemplated and generate new perspectives. And, if a viewer/participant chooses not to engage, that too is a form of productivity. He/she is being agentive in his/her choice of whether to engage.

Trowbridge discusses how the Visual Thinking Strategy helps with teachers’ identity formation and agency. Through her teachers’ quotes, Trowbridge describes how being in the moment helps with self-awareness and focuses on multi-perspectives. Art can provide the artist and the viewers/participants an opportunity for the development of self-awareness and polyphonia.

For teachers who do not want to sketch, Trowbridge gives them specific prompts focusing on the teaching process. I wonder why she did not let the task be more open-ended instead of limiting the teachers’ focus to certain topics. This also makes me wonder about the specificity of the question I want to place around the mirror in my project, the question I wish to use as a heuristic.  Am I allowing for the participants to focus on what’s important or salient for them or am I re-directing their focus into what’s important for me? If I really do not want to obscure anyone’s focus, what do I need to ask so the question highlights their perspectives more than mine? Gene said it very well when he stated, “in your own project, however, the artist is the subject” (personal communication, March 6, 2018). As I am the subject of my own work, the question needs to stem from my honest self; the process of this art is emergent and contingent and at any moment, I may change the target question, even during the exhibit itself.

Christina Trowbridge’s piece “Drawing Attention” was very powerful because it highlights a way to use art as a mindful intervention among a population of people for whom reflection and contemplation is immensely important. Within this reading, first year teachers reflect on both this experience and their day to day experience in the classroom. One middle school teacher wrote, “I constantly think that there is no hope for humanity”. This shook me as an extremely visceral comment, but speaks to the incredible pressures that New York City teachers are under.  There is a clear need for mindful interventions and teacher wellness. Trowbridge’s diorama as a heuristic model seems like a wonderful way to “focus attention to contemplation, reflection, and meditation” in a new environment that still stimulates learning in a calm and centered way.

In my own project, I am continuing to paint more maps, and I can sympathize with drawing as a focused meditation exercise. I am looking forward to visiting the museum, speaking with Christina Trowbridge, and engaging in this diorama drawing to promote conversations and reflections on teaching and learning.

We lost last week’s class, so I am posting some paintings that I have been working on. Each map is color coded based on various information gleaned from the 2010 census in Nassau County. The top left is the population of White people in each town (also, I was experimenting with using glaze to make the image opaque/transparent, because I want to paint a map over collaged newspaper clippings but still have the clippings present). The top right has the red paint highlighting the highest disparities of white-black populations. More red=more disparity. Bottom right is the literal number of black people in each town, and there are words/phrases related to this redlining cause/effect on the borders of downs with the most egregious segregation. Bottom left is color coded based on diversity of towns. White = 70% white population and higher. Grey is 31-69% white population. Black is where white population is 29% and lower. Also, I tried staining the canvas with coffee. I am thinking of nailing this one to a piece of wood.

I am eager to hear your feedback and comments on the art in progress!

Thanks,

Nick

One note- it’s been hard for me to figure out how to paste certain images on here. Maybe we can have five mins of next class to discuss best ways?

This week, I went to an amazing placed call the Interference Archives to find images I could bring to class that spark conversation about how artists have used lines. For my work, I’m still wondering what I will do with the lines. Will they make some piece of or a full image? Will they be without an identifiable form and more about how the ways in which I’ve torn, stretched, knotted the fabric reflects the experience and struggle of searching, finding, loosing and searching again for connection? I wanted to find images where the artists’ lines were visible, maybe even the main attraction, so I could get some ideas sparked for what I can do and why I might choose to do one rather than the other.

For some background, Interference Archives is a place that has movement art for many decades. Tons of political flyers, posters, calendars. You can find their website here: http://interferencearchive.org/ During their open hours, you can freely browse through things. it’s lots of fun.

I found mostly loosely connected pieces, and I wanted to share them because they are beautiful. I was drawn particularly to images from social movements in Mexico because that is where my mother’s family is from and the art was very powerful to me. What do you think about the lines in these pieces? How does their visibility impact your experience of these piece? What are they saying to you?

The last piece I also liked because the artist used the lines quite well to evoke labor, as Luttrell did with her cut outs. My own identity transformation I’m exploring in my lines (as I mentioned earlier, the experience of going from hearing the stories, to telling the stories) is very connected to my labor, to being a care taker. The things we do, and who we become. The daily acts of lifting, holding hands, bringing water. It makes sense to me to think of experience, identity and labor as intertwined.

These pieces I also thought spoke beautiful to the connection between our labor and effort, our connection to land and our people (however we define that), and our identity.

Anna’s Journal Entry

Update:

My son is home this week for a midwinter break, so I am hoping that tomorrow I will sit both of my children down to look at these three pictures and ask them to talk about them. If all goes according to plan, I will have a more substantial update for you in class on Wednesday. I have selected three images, one of which you have already seen. The bottom image is from Matthew’s graduation last June and the top one is from a few summers ago of them walking into the murky waters of Brighton Beach. I chose these three because in them I am always behind, on all three they are walking, and in all three my son’s gaze is away from me. I want to hear from my children there thoughts, their memories, their impressions, and make sure that their narrative has as much room in this project as does mine.

Inspiration:

I was very intrigued by the conversation we had last class with Wendy and the interaction vs. stillness of photographs, which was achieved by cutting out parts of the picture and then putting them together. I don’t know yet if this means anything, but I was so moved and impressed by how this process of carefully cutting different parts of a picture changed our perception of the images.

I am also endlessly inspired by all of your work and desperately trying to keep up. Thank you for that stimulation and motivation.

Two quotes have been on my mind since our last class, which have been driving my thinking.

• Using images as a way of seeing what is not sayable, something I think Wendy said in one of her videos, when she talked about her projects. I believe we all talked about it in one way or another, but I think it is very powerful to use images to represent something, show something, illustrate something, which cannot be said in any other mode.
• Another quote was brought up by Gene, who reminded me of Lisa Delpit’s work. “We do not really see through our eyes or hear through our ears, but through our beliefs.” I think it is very important to remind ourselves that everything we do in research will be shaped by who we are and understanding who we are and embracing our subjectivity is a luxury and strength of our work. Once it is done, it will be up to those viewing the work and up to their interpretations, which will be shaped by their beliefs. While it is daunting to think about how others will interpret our work, as we try to insure that we are understood, I think it is better to focus on representation of our thinking through our projects as transparently as possible, the rest is out of our hands anyway.

Going forward: 

I am hoping to have an update for you very soon with how the interaction went between my children. I am hoping that during this conversation, which I will video record, themes will emerge. I am also choosing quotes about memories, coming of age, and letting go from my fellow Russian thinkers/writers/researchers (Turgenev, Vygotsky, and possibly Bakhtin), as they undoubtedly shaped who I am today and my sentimental/melancholic nature. They may or may not find their way into the project. Time will tell.

Process:  I used my time this week to focus on creating with my project. I decided to use canvas with acrylic paints and it was an exciting process because this is the first time I have ever painted on canvas (I was nervous to begin, because I didn’t want to mess up). Logistically, I had some difficulty transferring my map outline to the canvas. I had traced my map outline on 8.5″x11″ paper, so I decided to tape one map to the 8″x10″ canvas. I drew in heavy pen, hoping some outline would bleed through to the canvas below, but it ended up piercing the paper and cutting/drawing as I went town by town around Nassau County. Clearly there must be an easier way to do this.

I then used a paint pen (sacrilegious?) to make the borders appear darker, and then filled in white/black to signify towns with at least 30% white/black population. I tried to build up the red borders between the black communities so it was almost a visible wall. I then scoured some articles in the newspaper for phrases and words that symbolize this racist layout of Nassau county, pasting them as borders around the most segregated towns. Finally, I painted the literal number of black citizens in each town (30 people or less) as of the 2010 census.

Reflection:  I would like to find a way for the white part of the map to pop out more, because it is too similar to the canvas color itself. Painting the surrounding areas of the map blue, as water and an island, could symbolize the isolation of this segregation. My wife also had the idea of collaging some images around the borders of the painting, images that relate to the housing/social discrimination which led us here (Levittown house ads, black soldiers coming home from WWII, banks who deny home mortgages to people of color). I am not sure if this will clutter the image or add to the story.

Going forward:  It is my intention to make multiple maps, because depending on what data I include, a different story is told. The map showing percentage of white population tells a different story that the one showing black population. I also want a bigger map so I can fit the towns names within the borders (someone recommended projecting the image of my map on a smart board, taping a canvas to the smart board and tracing over the image). I had an idea to paint this map on different backgrounds, as well, perhaps some that evoke different emotions . After hearing the reaction of someone who, when looking at one iteration of data on the map, was in disbelief, I thought I could record people’s reactions to seeing the map, and then using these sounds as a background (over headphones?) for the display. Another idea is to collect field-recordings in public spaces in some of these towns, and map them through contact points within the map, so that when you touch it, it will give you an idea of sound from that area. All of these ideas are floating in my head, and I’m not sure how much of it I will be able to accomplish this semester. I will bring my initial creation on Wednesday so I can get feedback from everyone.