Update:
My son is home this week for a midwinter break, so I am hoping that tomorrow I will sit both of my children down to look at these three pictures and ask them to talk about them. If all goes according to plan, I will have a more substantial update for you in class on Wednesday. I have selected three images, one of which you have already seen. The bottom image is from Matthew’s graduation last June and the top one is from a few summers ago of them walking into the murky waters of Brighton Beach. I chose these three because in them I am always behind, on all three they are walking, and in all three my son’s gaze is away from me. I want to hear from my children there thoughts, their memories, their impressions, and make sure that their narrative has as much room in this project as does mine.
Inspiration:
I was very intrigued by the conversation we had last class with Wendy and the interaction vs. stillness of photographs, which was achieved by cutting out parts of the picture and then putting them together. I don’t know yet if this means anything, but I was so moved and impressed by how this process of carefully cutting different parts of a picture changed our perception of the images.
I am also endlessly inspired by all of your work and desperately trying to keep up. Thank you for that stimulation and motivation.
Two quotes have been on my mind since our last class, which have been driving my thinking.
- Using images as a way of seeing what is not sayable, something I think Wendy said in one of her videos, when she talked about her projects. I believe we all talked about it in one way or another, but I think it is very powerful to use images to represent something, show something, illustrate something, which cannot be said in any other mode.
- Another quote was brought up by Gene, who reminded me of Lisa Delpit’s work. “We do not really see through our eyes or hear through our ears, but through our beliefs.” I think it is very important to remind ourselves that everything we do in research will be shaped by who we are and understanding who we are and embracing our subjectivity is a luxury and strength of our work. Once it is done, it will be up to those viewing the work and up to their interpretations, which will be shaped by their beliefs. While it is daunting to think about how others will interpret our work, as we try to insure that we are understood, I think it is better to focus on representation of our thinking through our projects as transparently as possible, the rest is out of our hands anyway.
Going forward:
I am hoping to have an update for you very soon with how the interaction went between my children. I am hoping that during this conversation, which I will video record, themes will emerge. I am also choosing quotes about memories, coming of age, and letting go from my fellow Russian thinkers/writers/researchers (Turgenev, Vygotsky, and possibly Bakhtin), as they undoubtedly shaped who I am today and my sentimental/melancholic nature. They may or may not find their way into the project. Time will tell.
